Repair Conversation

How to use it

1. First decide separately whether a shared conversation feels safe, voluntary, and timely.
2. If you both choose to continue, select only the steps that fit: pause, impact, responsibility, curiosity, need, offer, agreement, or follow-up.
3. Speak from your own experience without demanding forgiveness, agreement, or equal responsibility.
4. Pause or stop if there is pressure, fear, intimidation, blame shifting, or retaliation risk.

Reflection prompts

• What responsibility belongs to each person, if any, without forcing symmetry?
• What boundary, action, or support matters more than words right now?
• Would a later conversation, separate support, or no shared conversation be safer?

Facilitator guidance

Use only after screening for abuse, coercive control, intimidation, and retaliation. A script cannot create safety, substitute for accountability, or make a mutual repair frame appropriate when harm and power are unequal.

Adaptations & accessibility

• Use separate written reflections that are not exchanged unless each person freely chooses.
• Complete only one step per session with a clinician controlling pace and transitions.
• Offer nonverbal, translated, AAC, or support-person-assisted formats without requiring direct assertion.

Review considerations

Enhanced couples/family abuse-safety specialist and second licensed-clinician review required before use.